How to take back control of your life

It’s 10.59pm and I’ve been staring at my computer on what to write because I got caught up with blogging the “right way” and went into a big rabbit hole of self-doubt.

Can you relate?

Well this is my blog, so I can blog anyway I like and so I’ll just keep typing and hope for the best!

But it does bring me back to one of the regrets of the dying explored more deeply in a book written by Bronnie Ware, where they wished they had the courage to live a life true to themselves and not the life that others expected of them.

So imagine, you’ve come face to face with the knowing that you’re on your last days on earth and you hear yourself say “I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.”

I want you to take a moment, close your eyes and imagine this scenario clearly.

Say these words out loud to really feel the gravity of these words.

Then come back.

Life, at least the way I know it is chaotic and busy with two little kids. It’s so easy for me to get swept away with the day to day life that the year can feel like it flew by. My mind constantly somewhere else other than right here in this moment.

That’s why bringing my attention to the breath, my senses, what I can see, feel, smell and hear helps bring me back to the here and now. Incorporating mindfulness helps me stay true to my compass.

Being mindful can give space in our day to get present to areas of our life that we want to honour.

What are our dreams, desires and aspirations that are deep within that has been supressed because we’re too consumed about what others might say or think?

Maybe you’re in a job that is literately destroying your soul but you stay because of the money, you could be in a toxic relationship but preserve because it’s not the “right time” to leave or you find yourself late at night loading your body with all the stuff that’s triggering you to have major health problems but stress is to debilitating that you need the quick fix just get through it.

You’re waiting for the right time to change, whether that time comes, who knows.

I don’t have the answers for you and that’s the most powerful thing about this because only you can create a life that is true to yourself.

How do you know when you’re not in control?

It just feels icky because everything is hard and not in flow.

I’m actually thinking about my client who told me last week that she’s feeling like she’s found her frequency! You can read more about her recent testimony she wrote half way through her health coaching program with me.

So coming back to reading this sentence again, “I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me” I really get that no one can live my life except me.

Who knows maybe in the future, we can transport our consciousness into another body but right now as far as I know, this mind, body and spirit has me at its command.

Exercise:

So I dare you to just explore perhaps in a journal this week, is to imagine yourself at the end of your life and start writing just a few things you regretted not doing on the left hand side.

Then on the right hand side of your journal, pick one and write small actionable steps to making some of those things a reality for you.

For example, maybe you always wanted to learn to speak Spanish, play the piano, write a book, get a tattoo, be on stage at a TEDx talk, go to uni in your 30’s or live in a tiny house.

What’s one thing you could do tomorrow that brings you that one step closer to making it a reality for you?

For more support on how you can use mindfulness to help you overcome the overwhelm and get present to designing a life without regret, join my 5 day challenge click here.

The daily meditation practice for women with no time

You’re probably reading this now because you already know the benefits of having a daily meditation practice or have heard that meditation could help you manage your stress levels but feel like it’s an unattainable goal. Even the phrase “daily meditation practice” already seems time consuming and daunting to say the least, right?

But what if I said to you that implementing this special daily mediation practice is going to give you more time?

Yes, you read that right.

Often when we are time poor, we’re usually overwhelmed, over-stressed and over-worked. Our focus and productivity wanes. our modern busyness of life leads us to be completely unaware how much we are wasting because we’re committed to keep on moving, even if we’re dragging our feet by lunchtime.

Why meditation?

It’s free but also meditation can give you more time.

How? Meditation allows you to focus your attention inwards, cutting out the unnecessary clutter that could be causing confusion and indecision. When you have clarity and dominion over your thoughts, confusion dissipates and a call to action is visible.

If you have only a certain amount of time in the day and during these times you are more productive, you then create more time and have breathing space for the more important things in life like being present with family.

An effective way to incorporate meditation is to adopt what I like to call is the heart-full minute.

  • Put your hand on your heart and take 5 deep breathes. The goal is to focus on feeling the heart beat on the palm of your hands whilst noting your breath going in and out. Feeling your heart pulsate in itself bring your back to life force that is you.
  • You don’t need to think nothing, it’s perfectly normal to have thoughts especially judgmental thoughts about if you’re doing the heart-full minute correctly or what you need to be doing straight after the meditation.
  • To bring your focus back, start noting your breathe. So as you breathe in, say in your head you’re breathing in and so forth as you breathe out. Noting is a great tool to bring your attention back to stillness when you catch yourself carried away with your thoughts.

You might think a minute isn’t that long but you’d be surprised. The heart-full minute can be done anywhere and anytime, so many opportunities such as while you’re on the toilet, waiting at the grocery line, breastfeeding or having a shower.

Do this enough times and you get the compounding effect that meditation will get easier and easier the more you do it.

Finding practical ways to reduce stress in your life is a great foundation to help you balance your hormones and boost your fertility. For more tips to detox your mind and body, you can download my free 7 Day Hormone Cleanse here.